Telling Doug

The October after Doug and I got married, I bought a Christmas themed scavenger hunt for me to send Doug on to find a gift with.  The first year, his gift at the end was a Mouse Trap game from the baby on the way.  

Since I really didn't have a gift in mind for this year, I decided I would take a pregnancy test after he left for work and that would be his final gift.  I wasn't going to wait until Christmas Day to let him do the scavenger hunt, so I thought about when a good time would be.  We got engaged on December 21, so I decided that would be a good day to test and give him the news.

The night before, I was so excited about taking a test that I didn't sleep. The next morning, I needed to go to the bathroom pretty badly, but I wanted to video the test result, so I didn't want to take the test until Doug left for work.  When Doug's alarm went off, he didn't get up.  When the second alarm went off, he still didn't get up.  I gently woke him up and explained he needed to get going. I then went and fed the dogs, let them out.  I basically did anything I could do to get him out of the house ASAP.

When he finally left, I RAN to the bathroom and took the test.  I then videoed the test until it turned to 'pregnant'. That afternoon, while Weston was napping, I set out all the scavenger hunt clues.  The final clue was on our bathroom mirror.  It said:

"Three years ago today, you gave me a ring

I wonder what THIS December 21st will bring.

Go get Weston for your gift."

I had put a "Big Brother" shirt on Weston and I figured right before Doug went in to his room, I'd hand Weston the pregnancy test, sanitized obviously.  Doug usually gets home at the end of nap time, so I thought the timing would work out well.  Of course, wasn't that the day that Doug got out of work late.  I made Weston stay in his crib until Doug got home, so needless to say Weston wasn't the happiest or most cooperative camper when Doug finally went in there.  I don't have pictures either.

Since we had been trying, Doug sort of suspected I was pregnant, but had no idea that was the gift at the end of the scavenger hunt.

New Beginnings

As I alluded to in my Valentine's Day post (almost 2 months ago!), I was very sick for the first 2 months of the year.  I was hospitalized 3 times in about a month.  The worst part of the fact that I was so sick, is that I chose to take the chance that I would be sick.

You see, last Fall, I was getting baby fever and Doug and I had been discussing trying for another baby, so that Weston and the baby would be close in age.  After an unfortunate November, December arrived, as did this: 

 Doug and I were thrilled and told both sets of parents on Christmas Day, at which point I was only 5 weeks, which was early to tell anyone, but how often do you get to tell your parents on a major holiday that they're going to be grandparents again?!  

I don't know if I've mentioned it on the blog, but when we got pregnant with Weston, it was a COMPLETE surprise! In fact, we had no clue we were pregnant and we were certainly not planning on a baby.  We'd only been married about 6 weeks when we got the positive.

At the beginning of January, I started having nausea, which morphed into extreme nausea, which further morphed into hyperemesis, or extreme vomiting.  I couldn't keep anything down and therefore I was not getting nutrients and more importantly, the baby wasn't getting the nutrients it needed.  As I said above, I was in the hospital three times from mid-January to early February.  During my stays, I was given lots and lots of IV fluids with nutrients in them.  The first two times I was hospitalized, I felt better for a few days and then I started feeling bad again.  The third time I was hospitalized seemed to do the trick and I haven't had to go back since.  

I thought my nausea with Weston was bad, but it was a cakewalk compared to this pregnancy.  Doug and I thought we wanted 4 children, but as sick as I've been this pregnancy, I think this baby may be the last one.

Doug and my parents have been so great throughout this whole thing.  Luckily, Doug has a job where he can work from home if needed.  My parents live about 5-10 minutes away, so they came and took care of Weston when Doug couldn't stay home.  They all took such great care of me and helped me through one of the sickest times in my life.

I will provide more details tomorrow.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Happy Valentine's Day y'all!  I've had a rough month (+), but hopefully I'm on the mend.

Doug and I went out to dinner.  Weston stayed with my parents.  It was a very nice evening.

In honor of Valentine's Day, I'm going to fill out a survey.  Boring, I know, but at least I'm posting.

How long have you and your significant other been together?  3 1/2 years

How did you meet? (What’s your love story?) We met through a mutual friend. Doug was in town for Labor Day weekend and the friend invited both of us to go to trivia night.  We enjoyed each other's company and ended up going out 3 more times that weekend.  Shortly after, I got a job closer to where Doug lived and that was it. Here's the full story.

If married, how long have you been married? 2 1/2 years next month 

  

If you are married, where did you get married? Big or small wedding? We got married at Kirkwood Presbyterian Church in Bradenton, FL.  Our wedding was medium-sized.

  

Do you have any nicknames that you call one another? Not really

. 

Name 3 things you love most about your honey. #1 His love for his family #2 His work ethic #3 His ability to be incredibly laid-back, in turn keeping me calm (or trying to).

 

Tell us how he proposed.  After recreating our first weekend together, he took me to the park where we sat for many hours talking and proposed to me by the dolphin fountain.

Is he a flower and teddy bear kind of guy, or strawberries, champagne and rose petals? He brings me flowers (not always roses and not always red) on occasion, not just Valentine's Day, but otherwise, he thinks outside the box.

Are you a sunset dinner on the beach kind of girl, or a pop a movie in and relax on the couch? Definitely a movie and couch type of girl.

Tell us one thing you’d like to do with your significant other one day. If you could do anything? Go anywhere? I'd like to take our child(ren) to all the baseball parks in the U.S. (and the one in Canada).  This would allow my hubby to share his love of baseball with the children and allow me to see the U.S.

Tell us what you plan on doing this Valentine’s Day. We will try to go out to dinner, exchange gifts and spend time with Weston.

Are you asking for anything for Valentine’s Day? Nope, I'd be perfectly happy with sitting at home staring at each other, no gifts exchanged, if it means spending time with my husband and son.

Give us one piece of advice of keeping a relationship strong and full of love. Always remember why you fell in love with the person.  Date nights and being silly together help too. ;-)

Happy New Year!

Happy 2012!!

Obviously I had trouble keeping up with the blog last year.  I think I set my own expectations too high, posting every day.  I'm going to try to be a better blogger this upcoming year.

I have several things going on this year that are exciting, beginning with a new pen pal that I was matched up with through Leslie's blog.

I'm not making any resolutions for the year, but I am making goals.

• Be a better blogger
• Spend more time "present" with my family and friends (less iPhone, computer, iPad time)
• Enjoy each day
• Eat healthier

I hope everyone's 2012 is better than 2011.  

Weston's Labor and Birth Story

On June 25, 2010, I had a regularly scheduled doctor's appointment.  Unfortunately, my doctor was at a delivery, so I saw the nurse practitioner.  However, it was in his notes to offer me a scheduled induction.  This was because I had Strep B and therefore had to have antibiotics for a certain amount of time before delivery.  By scheduling an induction, the hospital would be able to ensure the correct amount of antibiotics would be in my system before I delivered.

Doug and I decided that having an induction would be the best idea.  We were told it would be either on Tuesday or Wednesday of the following week and that they would call us and notify us of the day and time we needed to go to the hospital.  For some inexplicable reason, once we left the doctor's office, I became very emotional.  I think having a 2-day window for when we would become a family made this whole 10-month situation more real.  I cried for a long time wondering if we had made the wrong decision by scheduling an induction. 

Later in the day, I received a call saying that my induction would be on Wednesday, June 30th and that I needed to be at the hospital at midnight that morning.  I kept hoping that in the next 4 days, I would naturally go into labor.  Apparently my stubborn son thought better of it, because we made it to midnight on June 30th with no overly exciting progress.

However, knowing when this baby would be born did allow me to get a pedicure, spend quality time with Doug during our last weekend as a two-some and prepare a little bit more for what was going to come, like I knew what to expect (haha).

So, on Tuesday we spent our last day as a couple.  We left the house about 11:45pm for a 5 minute drive. What? We were excited! When we got to the hospital, since it was so late, we had to go through the ER to get to Labor and Delivery.  We pre-registered at the hospital a few weeks before Weston's due date, so when I went into labor, we wouldn't have to waste time (or me trying not to kill someone since I'd be in pain) getting to L&D. However, the triage nurse made me give all of my information again (name, ss#, blood type, etc.), which if I were in labor, I'd be pissed to be giving this information.

When the triage nurse was finally finished grilling me, she opened the doors to the ER treatment area and told us she'd call L&D and let them know we were on our way.  No wheelchair, no directions, just go. Our hospital was under construction at the time, so there wasn't a direct path to L&D.  Instead, Doug and I weaved our way through the halls like mice in a maze.  Except we couldn't find our cheese...and there weren't too many people roaming the halls at midnight to ask for directions.  We went to several elevator banks until we finally found the correct one.  I remember we had to push the call button outside the doors of L&D and tell them who we were and why we were there.  That really stuck with me because it meant we were not going to be leaving those locked doors until we were parents.  Oh My!!

Once we got into our LDR room, which was quite spacious, the nurse had me change into a hospital gown and then they kicked Doug out.  I was a little confused because I was sure whatever part of my body they were planning on working on, Doug had seen before.  I mean let's face it, I was there to deliver his baby.  The baby got into my belly somehow... Anyhow, they began asking me all kinds of questions, some of which included whether or not Doug abused me in any way while I was pregnant or if he tried to hurt the baby in-utero.  I thought those were the most bizarre questions and if you knew Doug, you'd know that the idea of him abusing me or anyone else is extremely laughable.  I'm pretty sure most people don't get asked those questions and when I mentioned to my mom that I had been asked them, she thought the OB might have asked the hospital to ask me the questions because Doug came to every prenatal visit and perhaps the doctor thought he was controlling me.  Weston was our first baby, Doug was excited to go to all the visits and hear our baby's heartbeat and on ultrasound days, see the baby.  I'm fairly sure he won't accompany me to all of the appointments for baby #2, but if he wants to, so be it.

Anyway, once Doug was allowed back in, the nurses finished my IV and inserted the induction medicine into (onto?) my cervix.  They then told me I had to lay flat for the next several hours and to try and get some sleep.  They brought me an Ambien to help out with that.  I've never been a great sleeper, but I've never taken sleeping pills before to help combat insomnia.  Let me tell you, I will NEVER take another sleeping pill in my life!  There was a bottle of Gatorade or something on a table across the room.  I saw it as a very pregnant hula dancer giving birth.

Before I was induced, the doctor said the cervix medicine would do its job and we would have a baby by lunchtime.  At 8am when the OB arrived, I hadn't progressed much past 3cm, which I was almost at when I was admitted.  He made some comment about how comfortable I looked and then he broke my water, which I have heard some people say was the best feeling.  I  hated it!! It felt like wetting my pants for what felt like a couple hours.  Every time I would shift in the bed, there would be another gush.  YUCK!!

At apparently the same time as breaking my water, Satan my OB also ordered the Pitocin (which I'm pretty sure I wasn't hooked up to previously) turned up, WAY up.  I went from perfectly fine, playing cards and contracting without much discomfort, to OHMYGOODNESSMAKEITSTOP!! in about 15 minutes. 

My goal was to go without an epidural.  I planned to walk around to both have gravity help the situation and to be in a different position to labor.  I had a normal pregnancy without any real complications, so I figured walking around would be acceptable.  However, the nurses wouldn't let me get out of bed to use the bathroom, much less to let me walk around.  Therefore, I had to do all of my laboring in the bed.  Between that and the intensity of the Pitocin, my labor was very strong and my contractions were one on top of the next from 3.5 cm on. 

I labored naturally for the next 6 1/2 hours in darkness and silence, during which time the nurses kept making me move out of the only position that was comfortable* because they couldn't monitor the baby.  At some point, late in the 6 1/2 hours, they decided to put an internal monitor on the baby's head so that I could be in my comfortable* position.  So smart those nurses were... Why I couldn't walk around at that point, I'm still not sure, but my requests kept getting denied.  There was one nurse that kept telling me "just breathe".  She almost found herself thrown out of the window!

*comfortable if you are going through the most intense pain you've ever felt but momentarily, it's one step down from that.

By 2:30, I asked for an epidural, not because I couldn't just muster through the pain, but because at that point, I'd had energy-draining contractions one after the other for 6 1/2 hours and I didn't think I would have the energy to push when it came time if I didn't get some rest.  The nurse told me that I would have to wait until 2 bags of fluids were pushed into me to get my epidural.  I had been on an IV for at least 9 hours at that point.  Why did I need so much more fluid before I could get the epidural?! When I heard that fun news, I thought I was going to lose my mind.  After finally getting the fluids, they called anesthesia to come give me my epidural.  The anesthesiologist tried 3 times before successfully getting my epidural in the correct place.  I didn't care, just give me some relief FORTHELOVEOFGOD!! Doug tells me before the nurse had finished securing the epidural lines and whatever else she needed to do, I was in a deep sleep.  Apparently I did need the sleep.

The next thing I remember is the nurse waking me up after what seemed like 15 minutes, but was almost 2 hours later.  She told me it was time to push, so I needed to wake up.  I remember thinking, just let me sleep, I'll push when I'm less sleepy.

I began pushing about 5:00. I truly believe this was the most difficult part of the whole labor.  As much as I didn't enjoy the intense pain I was feeling, I hated pushing.  My epidural was great, I felt the pressure of the contractions so I knew when to push and it didn't hurt.  However, I have exertion-induced asthma.  Therefore, as you can imagine, I had a lot of trouble breathing and getting enough breath to push.  They didn't give me oxygen, so I guess they figured if I turned blue, they'd give me some?

After 46 minutes of pushing (and not breathing) I gave birth to what my OB said was "a solid one".  Weston was born at 5:46pm on 6/30/2010.  He weighed 8 pounds 13 ounces and was 22 inches long.

I had a student nurse that had been one of my nurses since 7am and she wanted to see her first baby born.  She was supposed to be at a meeting at her other job, but stayed until he was born. :-)

At literally 5:47, a cafeteria worker came in with a cheeseburger she claimed we ordered.  I was thinking 'sweetheart, my legs are still up in stirrups, I haven't birthed the placenta yet and I've been pushing for almost an hour.  I didn't order any food!'

Shortly after he was born, a nurse came to get Weston to take him to the nursery.  I told them that wasn't happening, I had just had him, come back later.  The lady gave me a real attitude and I wasn't impressed. 

My parents met Weston that evening and my in-laws met him on July 5th.

When I have another baby, I will make sure I can move around during my labor to try and help manage the pain.  I also hope to not have to be induced so that I can avoid Pitocin altogether.

On This Day Last Year...

A year ago today, Doug and I knew that it was our last day to be just a couple.  That night at midnight, we were going to the hospital for me to be induced.
Doug went to work in the morning and met me at the doctor's office.  I remember that visit being exciting, scary and painful all at the same time.  I was excited because this was the last visit before meeting our baby and finding out if we were having a son or a daughter.  I was scared because this was the last visit before meeting our baby! A nurse practitioner student checked me for dilation, and I was pretty sure she was checking my tonsils and hadn't clipped her nails in many months, hence the painful aspect.

I don't really remember doing much that day.  However, at that point in June in Mississippi, and being 9+ months pregnant, I didn't feel like going many places anyway.  The previous weekend we had gone to try and find a newborn size "My 1st 4th of July" onesie, to no avail.  However, trying to get in and out of the car was torture.  In fact, we went to the movies and the movie was going to be starting soon, so I told Doug to go and get the tickets and I'd waddle my way up there eventually.

That evening, we had dinner at home with my mom.  What we ate, I don't remember.  Then, I took a shower, shaved my legs as best as I could and double-checked the bags for the hospital.  I may have taken a short nap and then Doug and I made a video for our baby about how we were feeling the day before becoming parents.  We then left for the hospital.  Within 24 hours, our lives would change forever.

You've Won...

A NEW CAR!!

Ok, so we didn't win a new car, however we did go and purchase one today.

Several months ago, Doug and I decided that we were outgrowing my Toyota Yaris.  Weston's car seat has never really fit where both Doug and I could be comfortable.  The passenger seat was always pushed up almost to the dashboard, which is neither safe nor comfortable.  Also, we want to have more children and we knew we couldn't fit another car seat in that car much less fitting a Great Dane and a Labrador in the backseat with two children.

We were originally looking at buying a GMC Terrain, but after looking further, we decided to buy a Hyundai Tucson Limited.  So far, we love it.  One of the biggest benefits is the dual climate control.  Doug and I can never agree on the temperature in the car and now we can both choose our own temperature.  Also, it has heated seats for winter.  We have a back-up camera and remote start.  Living in Alabama, it will be a HUGE help to be able to turn the car on before we get in it so that it's cooled off and not so hot, especially for Weston.

The only downside we have found so far is that the storage space is a lot less than in the Yaris.  We were able to fit the big stroller, umbrella stroller and groceries in the trunk with no problem.  In the Tucson, we can barely fit the big stroller, much less groceries.

Regardless, we really like our new car and can't wait to utilize all of its capabilities.

Easter 2011

The Easter Bunny definitely showed up at our house yesterday!


Weston is a very blessed little boy.  The Easter Bunny left him many goodies including Special Agent OSO and a Special Agent Wolfie plushes, a blue bunny, blocks and books.

His biggest gift from the EB was a redneck swing set.  It is just a few pieces of wood constructed to hold his new swing.  He loves swinging in it!

My parents got him a pool and pool toys, so that will be a lot of fun to play in as the weather warms up!

Weston is a very blessed little boy.

Swimming

Last night, Doug and I became members of the YMCA.  We had both been members of the Y when we were younger, but since moving away from Florida, neither of us had thought to become members again.

Near our house is a brand new Y that opened about the time we moved up here.  Because it was so cold up here from the time we arrived until a few weeks ago, I hadn't given much thought to swimming and/or teaching Weston to swim.  However, the past few weekends have been beautiful and caused me to long for a pool to swim in.  I also decided this would be a good time to teach Weston how to swim.  I looked online for when the next swim class would start.  I found out that it starts on Monday, so I told Doug we needed to become members ASAP so that we wouldn't have to pay the non-member fee.  Another perk of being a member would be access to the awesome gym, so it's not just for swim lessons.

After we took a tour of the facilities, we decided that we should definitely join and that perhaps for the time being, Doug and I could work on teaching Weston to swim, since the classes were quite full, and I'd prefer to have a smaller learning environment for him.  Plus, they have a toddler splash pool that he can touch the bottom of, which will give him more confidence and me more peace of mind while he learns to swim.

This morning, we went shopping for a swimsuit, swim diapers and floaties for his arms.  This afternoon, we took Weston to the pool.  My firstborn is apparently a fish because he has no fear of the water and wanted us to let go of him so he could explore on his own.  We also went into the big pool and he swam back and forth in between Doug and myself.

The best bonus of all was that he was VERY tired when we got done swimming and he was ready for a long nap.  Hmm, maybe we'll go swimming every day...

Driveway Chalk Fun

I had to go to the store today to have a few prescriptions filled.  Although I was the only one in the pharmacy, they told me it would be about an hour.  Great...  So, I made the most of the time and went shopping.

Always keeping my little guy in mind, I looked for big crayons made for little hands. I figured I'd get some paper or a coloring book and let him play with the stuff.  However, I couldn't find any crayons, so I looked for a plan B.  I found sidewalk chalk and it was very inexpensive, so I bought it.

After naptime, we went outside to use the chalk.  Weston loved playing with it, banging two pieces together to see what noise it made, but not using it to scribble.  He did however have chalk all over himself. 

He's still little so we'll try it again sometime soon.  Eventually he'll get the point and we can scribble in the driveway.

Hurt Feelings

When I woke up this morning, I checked my Facebook feed, well, because that's what I do.  I guess maybe it helps me feel connected to the outside world when my biggest entertainment for the day is a 9 month old and I don't see an adult all day until Doug gets home from work.


Anyway, I checked my feed and saw that one of my friends had joined a specific group.  This group is dedicated to breastfeeding and bashing formula feeding.  I just recently discussed the choice to breastfeed vs. formula feeding.  I feel that however you feed your child is your business and you should not condemn those who feed their child differently.


I was very hurt that my friend would join this group because it makes me wonder if she condemns me for formula feeding Weston.  I have thought about this group all day long.  My feelings have been very, very hurt by the fact that there are many, many people in this world that feel that those who do not nurse their children are bad parents, selfish and lazy.


As far as giving my child nutrition, I am just as good of a mother as any other mother out there.  I may be better than or lack in other areas compared to other mothers, but my child is as healthy and well-fed as any other baby.


I do not feel as if I should have to defend my and millions of other women's choice to formula feed our baby.  Whether children are formula fed because of health issues or because a mother prefers to isn't anyone's business to comment on.  I am SO tired of breastfeeding mothers thinking they are holier than thou.

I don't ever hear parents that formula feed their babies condemning those who breastfeed, so why do those who breastfeed feel they have the right to condemn those of us that don't?

Prunes...YUCK!!

*This is a bodily fluids post.  Read at your own risk.*

Weston usually has no issues moving food through his body.  Even if he's had a small stoppage, we've given him either more time or a little apple juice and everything moves on through. 

Since we've been giving him Tylenol for his teething, he has become stopped up more frequently.  He's not really a fan of the reduced sugar apple juice though, so we can't give him much of it before he will stop drinking it.  He hadn't had "progress" for a couple of days and it was starting to affect his stomach.  Therefore, we decided as a last resort, to give him prunes.  Most people won't eat prunes by choice, however many people swear by prunes to help relieve constipation.

Weston isn't picky and will eat just about anything.  The first few bites of prunes went well, but very quickly Weston figured out that he wasn't a fan of prunes and then clenched his jaw shut, refusing to eat anymore.  Doug and I ended up wrestling with a 9 month old to get the majority of a container of prunes into his body.

We had given him the prunes at about 10pm (he's usually in bed by now, but we wanted to get him some relief as soon as possible and it was time for his night feeding anyway).  I figured the prunes would work overnight, possibly causing a blowout and mess in the crib.  However, the next morning, there was no relief for Weston, but thankfully, also no mess for me to clean up.  Before his afternoon nap, I put Weston on the changing table, but he only had a wet diaper.  As I put the clean diaper under him, he coughed.  Apparently the cough broke the dam and let's just say that Weston was given relief and I was given a huge mess to tend to.  I was just glad that Weston was no longer stopped up.

Perhaps after the prune experience, Weston will be more open to drinking the apple juice we give him.

Thank God For Unanswered Prayers

When I was in the car today, I heard "Thank God For Unanswered Prayers" by Garth Brooks and it made me start thinking about my unanswered prayers.

I think about the several guys that I thought, at the time, could become my husband.  I think about what my life would be like now if I had married any of those guys.  I was SO broken-hearted when those relationships ended.  I thought I'd never find love (not that I loved any of those guys).  I could have been married to a teacher, a Army guy or a policeman.  I probably wouldn't have the opportunity to be a stay at home mom, but more importantly, I wouldn't have Weston.  I know that my life wouldn't be nearly as amazing as it is now.

I also think about if life had worked out the way I had prayed, I would have moved to NYC to teach inner-city children, which means I wouldn't have worked at the learning center where I befriended one of Doug's friends who introduced me to the man of my dreams.  We wouldn't have lived in the same region, much less the same state, so there's no way we would have met each other.

It's no secret that I really want(ed) a girl.  I was devastated when Weston was born and the little girl I so badly wanted was a (not-so) little boy that I didn't know I needed.  I thank God every day for a healthy, adorable, sweet little boy.  I wouldn't trade him for several girls.  He is a mama's boy and I enjoy watching him learn new things and grow up.  It absolutely breaks my heart to think that, at one point, I didn't think I wanted a boy.  It also breaks my heart to think about the fact that he's almost 1.  This doesn't mean that I don't still pray that Baby #2 is a girl, but I can appreciate a boy and if #2 is a boy, I will still be overjoyed.

Lastly, I thank God that my grandmother passed away when she did.  I obviously miss her VERY much and do wish she were here.  However, I know she is no longer in pain and no longer worrying when the next heart attack or stroke will occur.  Her death caused me to re-evaluate life and to see that I needed to finish college.  If she had still been alive, knowing how precious life is, would I have followed a man that I hardly knew to Alabama, causing me to be away from her in her last years?  Would she have approved of me moving in with a guy I hadn't yet married?  No!  I would have respected her wishes and most likely stayed in Florida, perhaps forfeiting my relationship with Doug.

I thank God for unanswered prayers.  Even when we don't think the choice is right or good, it always works out in the end and He has what's best for us planned out.

In A People House

Partly because I love books and partly because I am a teacher and know how important early literacy and books are, my child(ren) have a very expansive library of books.  These books range from picture books all the way up to chapter books.  Doug and I, along with my parents, add to their library at least once a week.  Some people may think that reading to children is ridiculous or a waste of time, but I honestly believe that it helps children immensely to learn letters and how to read and to expand their imaginations.

When I was little, I used to like a book by Dr. Suess called In A People House.  I'm not sure what was so 'great' about the book that I remembered it so well, but it was still one of my favorite books nonetheless.  It is about a mouse that shows a bird around a 'people house' naming items along the way.  The book contains household words such as window, wall, ceiling, ball, etc. which helps children put the spelling of words with pictures of the same item.

I knew that when I was ready to have children, this book would definitely be in their library.  I probably have my copy somewhere, however, after 17 moves, I'm not sure where the book is.  I had been looking in stores for this book for a while because I also thought it would be a good book for my classroom.  About a week before we found out we were expecting, I happened to see the book for the first time in many, many years, at a military Px of all places.  I mentioned to Doug that since I couldn't find it anywhere and because I had an inkling that perhaps I was pregnant, we should buy the book.  We had just gotten married and back from our honeymoon, so money was tight and Doug suggested we wait until we were sure we were having a baby.  Fast forward several months and I have forgotten about getting this book because I was focused on buying more important things for the baby.  I came home one day and found In A People House sitting on my pillow.  Doug had ordered it online and told me that the baby wanted me to have it.

Doug and I have both read this book to Weston several times and he seems to enjoy it.  I can't wait to read it to subsequent children and maybe even have Weston read it to his younger siblings.  Hopefully it will become one of their favorite books and read it to my grandchildren.

Mothering Choice #3

The past couple of days, I have discussed choices I (or Doug and I) made with regards to our child.  Today, I am discussing circumcision.  This is a very personal choice for any parent of a boy.

Regardless of the statistics presented (more than 80% of American men are circumcised; 650,000 male babies were circumcised in 2009; uncircumcised men are just as clean as those who are circumcised; circumcising removes a lot, if not all, sexual pleasure), it is up to each set of parents whether they want to have their son circumcised or not.  Whichever path they choose for their son should not be judged or criticized.

Critics of circumcision state many reasons for not circumcising male babies.  Looking like their father, cleanliness and mutilation are all cited as reasons against circumcising a baby.  Also, people say that it is wrong of the parents to take away the right of the child to do with his manhood what he pleases, i.e. if he wants to be circumcised as an adult, he can make that decision for himself.

Those who are pro-circumcision also have many reasons for their decision.  They want their son to look like his father, they feel that it would be cleaner or perhaps there are religious reasons for their choice.  It has also been pointed out that if a male is circumcised as an older child or as an adult, their can be more complications both with the surgery and with the recovery/result.

I find it very interesting that the people that are most embroiled in this debate are women.  Women don't have a basis to decide whether or not circumcision hurts, if babies remember the procedure or if it is easier to clean as an adult.  If you asked any man that was circumcised as a baby, unless he is lying, he will say he doesn't remember the surgery, nor can they tell you if it hurt or not.  Also, I'd like to know how research was done to determine that sexual pleasure is greatly diminished by circumcision.  If an intact man has had sex, he knows the feeling.  If he is then circumcised, he knows that feeling as well.  However, if his circumcision is poorly done, that may affect his pleasure level.  If a baby is circumcised at birth, he doesn't know what kind of pleasure he would have had intact, so he can't compare his pleasure.  Either way, if surveyed, all men would probably say they get plenty of pleasure.  Women commenting and judging on circumcision is like a man deciding if a woman should have an epidural during childbirth or not.  Neither have the right to decide on the opposite gender issues.

I was recently in a public bathroom changing Weston.  For whatever reason, a woman decided to comment on Weston's genitals and the decision that we made.  She felt the need to give me her opinion.  I brushed it off, but seriously?!  I don't care if she's the foremost expert on circumcision choices, who is she to tell me what I should or shouldn't have done with my child? 

With regards to Weston, the choice was ultimately up to Doug.  He is male and can relate to the genitalia a male has.  Although I had a definite opinion one way, we discussed the pros and cons of both.  We decided on what we felt was best for our child and any future sons.  Whether or not it was the "right" choice by anyone else's standards doesn't really matter, it's what we decided for our child.  No judgement needed.

Motherhood Choice #2

Yesterday, I spoke about the decision to bottle feed over nursing.  Today, I am discussing Doug's and my choice to disposable diaper over cloth diapering.

Honestly, cloth diapering was never an option for Doug and myself.  Some of our friends chose to cloth diaper and that was their choice.  When they tried to convince us with information about the toxins in disposable diapers, I felt like they were going too far.  Fans of cloth diapers also point out that diapers sit in landfills for many, many years.  I guess I'm just not environmentally concerned enough to care.  Sorry.

Admittedly, the diaper covers stores and shops sell these days are adorable.  However, that is not enough to sway my decision.

Doug and I chose to use disposable diapers for several reasons.  First, unless your child is sitting in a diaper for hours (which they shouldn't be regardless of diaper material), there isn't a huge risk of the so-called poison affecting the baby.  Secondly, when using cloth diapers, you have to remove the "solids" out of the diaper before washing it in the washing machine.  Who wants to play with poop?  It's all I can do to wipe my child's behind and deposit the offending diaper in the garbage.  Plus, even if you remove the waste, you cannot get your water hot enough to properly kill any bacteria, so then any other clothes you wash are being washed with bacteria.  If you choose to send the diapers to a diaper service, you still have to remove the poop and when you receive the diapers back, you don't know what other babies have used the diapers.  I can't see diapering my baby in cloth that has other peoples' children's bacteria traces left on them.  Also, what do you do with the soiled diaper out in public?  Dumping it into a toilet is all well and good, but you still have the remnants in the diaper stinking up the car or diaper bag.  Where do you put the baby while you're emptying the diaper?

If one chooses to cloth diaper, I don't think they are bad parents because I feel that there may be extra bacteria on their child or share with them my thoughts on the subject.  I just politely state that we are using disposable diapers and we are quite happy with that.  Therefore, people who cloth diaper should not accuse me of being a bad parent because I diaper my child in supposedly toxin-filled diapers.

Whichever way people choose to diaper, it's right for their family and let's be honest, cloth or disposable, when the baby poops, it's always toxic!

Motherhood Choice #1

Even before I was pregnant, I read blogs, especially those written by mothers.  I figured I could live vicariously through their lives until I had a family of my own.  Several of the blogs I read advocated for breastfeeding.  One blog in particular stated that if you don't breastfeed, you're a horrible mother who doesn't want a healthy child.  At the time, I disagreed, but I didn't think much more of it.

When I became pregnant with Weston, several people insisted that I nurse the baby.  That it is completely unhealthy and unnatural to give a baby formula.  Other people thought that I should just formula feed from the beginning.  Family history pointed towards me having the inability to nurse, but every woman is different.  Regardless of what people thought, I figured I would make a decision and then whatever happened, happened.

My decision was that I would try to nurse and if it didn't work, I wouldn't be heartbroken.  I was criticized for this choice, people saying that since I had a blase' attitude, I wouldn't put forth the effort to nurse my baby.  However, since breastfeeding is such a 'natural' thing, I wasn't worried.

When Weston was born, I did try to nurse him.  For the first one and a half days we were in the hospital, I tried to breastfeed Weston.  No matter what position he was in, how many times the lactation specialist and nurses tried to help the two of us, Weston would not latch.  He also fell asleep as soon as I put him to my breast.  The morning of the day we were being released, the nurse finally said that the baby needed some nutrition before he could be released, to ensure that everything in his body was working alright.  She brought me formula to feed him.  Although I wasn't going to be nursing him, I didn't feel ashamed for not.

By giving Weston formula, I have definitely still bonded with him just fine.  It also gave Doug the chance to bond with him that he wouldn't have had if I nursed Weston.  When I was struggling with post-partum depression, letting someone else feed him allowed me to get some much-needed sleep and stay sane.  I challenge anyone to prove to me that I am not as bonded with my child as a mother and child who nursed.

We have continued to give Weston the formula for 9 months now.  With the exception of when I had the flu and Weston caught a small strain from me (coughing and a low-grade fever that lasted less than a couple of hours), he has been incredibly healthy. 

The formula being produced today is the closest to breastmilk that it's ever been.  Also, many people I know were given formula way back when and they are healthy, smart individuals.  I truly don't believe that breastmilk is a noticeable amount healthier than formula.

However, I have received a couple of emails and Facebook messages from people who feel like I am a failure as a mother, simply because I chose not to nurse.  I have been lambasted for "intentionally poisoning" my child and for "shunning my child, because clearly you don't want to bond with your child".  I don't feel like I should have to defend my choice to bottle feed (or any parenting choice, really). 

I may or may not nurse my next child.  If I do, good for me.  If I don't, good for me.  I highly doubt that I will bond any more or have any healthier of a child if I nurse.  Ultimately, it is my choice and my business.

Do I believe that if I had nursed him, he'd be any healthier? No.  Do I feel like Mom's antibodies are good for the baby? Yes.  Do I feel like I am doing my child an injustice by not nursing him? ABSOLUTELY NOT!

I feel that the parenting community as a whole needs to support each other.  Whether one chooses to nurse or not is an individual choice.  There may also be more reasons below the surface as to why someone didn't nurse.  I support those who nurse and those who formula-feed without bias.  I expect the same support.  Parenting is hard enough without parents judging the decisions of other parents simply because they didn't make the same choice.

Staying Home vs Going to Work

This isn't a post about which one I should do.  Nope.  This is a post about what choices Doug had this morning and he now has a clear answer on which he should have done, which is the opposite of what he actually did.

*Background Story- Doug has an old Camaro that he and his dad were going to fix up.  It ran alright, but they wanted to improve it.  Then I came onto the scene and Doug's money that he had set aside to fix up his car went onto my finger and into a wedding and honeymoon.  This made me feel very bad that his money was diverted, but I do appreciate it.  His car was taken to his parents' house at Thanksgiving 2008.  It remained untouched until we could get the funds together, which took until this past Fall.  We shared one car and after we had Weston, Doug had a beater car that was on its last leg, so that I would have a car to take Weston out and about.  When we moved to North Alabama, Doug's beater car stopped working, so again, we had one car.  He took it to work everyday, so Weston and I were stranded at home and I prayed that there wasn't an emergency with Weston.*

Last Thursday, Doug and I went and met the guy that was driving Doug's car to us on a car carrier.  Everything looked good and he drove it to work on Friday.  We used my car over the weekend, so he didn't drive his car all weekend.  Yesterday morning, he also drove to work with no issues.  Even though it was VERY cold, the car started right up.

This morning however, the car chose not to start and Doug assumes it is because it was cold.  As I pointed out though, it was colder yesterday and started just fine.  So, Doug took my car to work, picked up his laptop and came home to work, so that I could have the car.

Weston woke up early, about 8:45.  When he wakes up that early, I usually make him stay in his crib until at least 9:30.  This is for two reasons: 1) sometimes he will fall back asleep and 2) if he gets up too early, he spends the entire morning, until naptime, being a huge grumblebee.  Well, Doug didn't realize this so he grabbed Weston when he woke up.  In his defense, he wanted to give me a chance to sleep without listening to Weston whining on the monitor.  As predicted, Weston was in a terrible mood until he finally got a nap. 

Doug struggled to get some work done in between Weston's fits and the commotion going on around him.  In the middle of one of Weston's screaming jags, I told him that THIS is why the choice to go to work everyday is always better than the choice to stay home.  He may miss us when he's at work, but at least he can have peace and quiet and adult conversations.  Needless to say, he wholeheartedly agreed that he should have stayed at work (and should have left Weston in his crib a little longer).

Teen Pregnancy/Bless Her Heart

Doug and I tutor a high school student to prepare her for the SAT on Sundays.  We tutor her at a local library. 

Yesterday, while Doug was tutoring, I saw a teenage girl who was about 14 browsing the "young adult" section.  She seemed completely in place...until I saw that she was about 8 months pregnant.

My first thought was 'you are ruining your life.  You are going to miss the end of the school year.  Most teen parents don't complete high school or go to college.'

My second thought was 'oh, honey! If only you knew that the 20 minutes you spent browsing the books and the 20 minutes you spent looking through them on the couch, yeah, you won't have the luxury or quiet to do either of those things anytime soon.'  Bless her heart!

I wish someone had told me just how hard parenthood is and how little time you have to yourself to accomplish anything.  I had some inkling, but I really had NO idea what parenthood is like.  I remember feeling like I was in the middle of the ocean, drowning, and no one was there to help me get above water.  This, of course, wasn't true; I had Doug and my mom.  However, I didn't feel like they had any clue how I felt.

Parenthood has gotten much better and I am looking forward to expanding our family.  For the teenage girl though, without the support of family (which she very well may have) and the baby's father, and the fact that she is still a child herself, she has a long road to hoe.  I know when I was her age, there is no way that I could have handled the pressures and stresses (and sleeplessness) or parenthood. 

Date Night and The Adjustment Bureau

Last night, my parents agreed (painfully I'm sure) to babysit Weston so Doug and I could go see a movie on our own.

We went out to dinner first and then walked to the movie theater.  We splurged on special seats, reclining, leather ones that are located in the balcony of the theater.  It wasn't really worth it, in my opinion.

We saw The Adjustment Bureau with Matt Damon and Emily Blunt.  I was a little hesitant to see this movie because it seemed like it may be another thriller that I can't follow.  However, I ended up following it just fine and actually enjoyed it.  This movie definitely makes you think about the course(s) life can take and how it happens.  I would definitely recommend seeing it.

Thank you again to my parents who watched Weston, Doug and I really needed a date.