Mothering Choice #3

The past couple of days, I have discussed choices I (or Doug and I) made with regards to our child.  Today, I am discussing circumcision.  This is a very personal choice for any parent of a boy.

Regardless of the statistics presented (more than 80% of American men are circumcised; 650,000 male babies were circumcised in 2009; uncircumcised men are just as clean as those who are circumcised; circumcising removes a lot, if not all, sexual pleasure), it is up to each set of parents whether they want to have their son circumcised or not.  Whichever path they choose for their son should not be judged or criticized.

Critics of circumcision state many reasons for not circumcising male babies.  Looking like their father, cleanliness and mutilation are all cited as reasons against circumcising a baby.  Also, people say that it is wrong of the parents to take away the right of the child to do with his manhood what he pleases, i.e. if he wants to be circumcised as an adult, he can make that decision for himself.

Those who are pro-circumcision also have many reasons for their decision.  They want their son to look like his father, they feel that it would be cleaner or perhaps there are religious reasons for their choice.  It has also been pointed out that if a male is circumcised as an older child or as an adult, their can be more complications both with the surgery and with the recovery/result.

I find it very interesting that the people that are most embroiled in this debate are women.  Women don't have a basis to decide whether or not circumcision hurts, if babies remember the procedure or if it is easier to clean as an adult.  If you asked any man that was circumcised as a baby, unless he is lying, he will say he doesn't remember the surgery, nor can they tell you if it hurt or not.  Also, I'd like to know how research was done to determine that sexual pleasure is greatly diminished by circumcision.  If an intact man has had sex, he knows the feeling.  If he is then circumcised, he knows that feeling as well.  However, if his circumcision is poorly done, that may affect his pleasure level.  If a baby is circumcised at birth, he doesn't know what kind of pleasure he would have had intact, so he can't compare his pleasure.  Either way, if surveyed, all men would probably say they get plenty of pleasure.  Women commenting and judging on circumcision is like a man deciding if a woman should have an epidural during childbirth or not.  Neither have the right to decide on the opposite gender issues.

I was recently in a public bathroom changing Weston.  For whatever reason, a woman decided to comment on Weston's genitals and the decision that we made.  She felt the need to give me her opinion.  I brushed it off, but seriously?!  I don't care if she's the foremost expert on circumcision choices, who is she to tell me what I should or shouldn't have done with my child? 

With regards to Weston, the choice was ultimately up to Doug.  He is male and can relate to the genitalia a male has.  Although I had a definite opinion one way, we discussed the pros and cons of both.  We decided on what we felt was best for our child and any future sons.  Whether or not it was the "right" choice by anyone else's standards doesn't really matter, it's what we decided for our child.  No judgement needed.